How to Be Calm

The fact that you are reading this article and searching for solutions for your anguished mind is an indication of your sincere effort to find a concrete answer to the problem of stress.

While constant thinking and worrying can take a heavy toll on our physical and emotional health, the peace of mind is obviously lost in the flood of thoughts that disturbs the mind. There is no doubt that the daily hustle can leave us emotionally drained and physically exhausted, and calmness of mind and peace in life remains a distant dream.

There can be a variety of reasons behind the anguished mind. Failure in a relationship, business, career, exams, or sudden loss of a near one are just a few of them. All these things can trigger behavioral changes in us that can rob us of our patience and calmness.

It is a harsh fact that lifestyle changes have induced stress, social anxiety, and impatience in majority of the population.

Still, it is observed that many people have an inborn habit or to be more logical, I would say that they have somehow developed a habit of constantly worrying, fretting, and losing their temper on issues that need little or no attention.

A perennial source of grumbling and complaining thoughts circulates in their head, leaving the brain choked. After all, the human mind is a machine and it does need rest!

Moreover, we also observe that there is a certain breed of people who are possessed with the qualities of patience and maturity, and can easily sail the high and low tides of life. These are the successful people who define excellent personality traits and keep their heads calm and cool in every circumstance.

People with a high emotional intelligence have been found to have better control on their mood swings and they are easily able to deal with difficult situations. Anger and stress management are the two key factors that can help you trace the root cause of your anger and dissatisfaction, and help you to improve your personality.

Quite frankly, the only person who can help you in the quest to learn the techniques of staying calm is none but you! You have to find the root cause of your problem and then consistently work on it. Undoubtedly, your family and friends are always there with you!

• Go to a calm and cool place, may be your local park, a nearby church, a less-visited restaurant, or any place that can give you some soulful moments with yourself. Simply sitting on cool green grass under the limitless sky can sooth your nerves. 

• If you cannot find any such place, dim your drawing room light and sit relaxed on your couch. Make sure there is proper ventilation in the room. If you are lucky to have an access to the terrace, it can be good option.

• Before you question me about the inner you, let me make things simple. By "inner you", I do not mean any spiritual enlightenment or something very abstruse! It is just that you need to open your mind, effortlessly, without a calculating and judging mind! Just be! Just exist! Do not let yourself be bounded by any belief or dogmas. Leave all thoughts.

• I know that it is not so simple, but if you just let the thoughts come and go, you will slowly develop an inner awareness. You will see how you can separate yourself from the monotonous self talk of your mind. You will see that thoughts will constantly hit your mind, but once you are aloof from them, you will be able to generate a distance.

• This does not mean that you will stop the daily works that involve thinking! Carry your life as you have been, but sit and observe your mind just occasionally. This is just like meditation, where you are able to feel how your mind spoils the peace by constant blabbering.

• You will have a profound realization that as you let go of your thoughts, your mind will be uncluttered. This is the revelation you have to seize and focus so that the next time you are going to be caught in the vicious cycle of repeating the same thoughts, you will be able to order your mind to relax.

Well, if you have some practical problems related to anger and mood swings, then it is a good idea to consult a counselor and try to get rid of it. Do not be crestfallen if you get angry in the heat of the moment and regret later, as it happens if you have a long continued habit of anger-related problems.

There are as such no hard-and-fast rules on how to be calm. However, with good lifestyle habits, managing your life by setting priorities, and learning to fight each day at a time, you can reduce stress and to stay in control of any situation. Even good books can help you to gain control over your thoughts and worrying habits. One of my personal favorites that has helped me a lot is How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie. Pick it up from your local book store and do read it.