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How to Find Yourself?

Aastha Dogra Mar 22, 2020
Do you often feel lost? Do you think you are living somebody else's life? If yes, discover ways to find yourself by going through these easy to understand pointers on how to deal with everyday life.
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. - E.E.Cummings
The greatest explorer on this earth never takes voyages as long as those of the man who descends to the depth of his heart. - Julien Green
Such quotes about trying to find yourself and doing what one believes in, by way of connecting with one's inner self, often make many of us wonder, what it means to find ourselves, and if we are really "lost" that we have to find ourselves? To find answers to such questions, simply look at yourself in the mirror.
In your reflection do you see the person you wanted to be when you were growing up? Is this the way you always wanted to look or act or think? Do you think that the person in front of you is living his "best" life? If all these answers are negative, then you should start thinking about your spiritual growth by finding yourself. Let's see how to do that.

Ways for Finding Yourself

Give Yourself a Break

Take a break from everything i.e. work, personal life, and all worldly things. Go to the mountains, seaside or any place which gives you peace. Ponder, why you seem lost. Is it because of over work or you are not leading a life that you want to?
Is it because you are not satisfied with the people or things around you? Try to find answers to these questions to determine the cause behind your restlessness. This will help you identify the problem areas in your life.

Be Yourself

For once, instead of being the way others want you to be, be yourself. Think about the things that you would want to do, if you didn't have any family obligations or any money issues.
Think about the kind of relationship you would want to be in, the place that you would like to stay in, the kind of lifestyle you would like to lead, if you didn't have the society or people around you, judging all the time. Once you arrive at the answers, start building your life on those lines.

Focus on Yourself

Focus on your qualities, positive traits, and some negative ones too! Think of the words that define you or words that you would want to be known as. Some of the words that you can think of are - honest, adventurous, loving, romantic, idealistic, strong, independent, etc.
Write these words on a piece of paper and then, from now on, live your life in such a way that it incorporates all these. By doing this, you will slowly and slowly become the person you always wanted to be!

Be Self-sufficient

Do not depend on anyone and try to meet all your needs - emotional as well as financial, yourself. To be truly liberated and free, a person needs to be strong and self-reliant.
Unless and until you are happy with yourself and do not necessarily need anyone, you will not know true love. So to bring "real" people and true love in your life, you need to be self-dependent first. You would be surprised to know that many people have found themselves through their close relationships.

Reflect on the Past

Reminisce about the situations when you were the happiest. To reflect and to connect with yourself, use subconscious mind exercises such as meditation, visualization and self hypnosis.
Think what you were doing or with whom you were when you were the happiest. This will help you to identify what you want to do in life, which make you happy and also certain people whose company you enjoy. Thereafter, do the very same things in life and bring people who are important to you, close to yourself.

Maintain a Diary

Determining what you want to do with your life, will not come to you in a day or two. It is an ongoing process and it can take months or years. You can maintain a written record of all your feelings, thoughts and musings, which you can go through later.
Start writing a diary on a daily basis, and in it record the little things that made you happy that day. Pour all your emotions and feelings about life in it and who knows may be one day going through it, you will find yourself.


Once you have discovered what you want to do in life, take action for self improvement. Even if it means taking up small things such as pole dancing or painting, go ahead and do it. If you want a career change, plan and take steps accordingly.
If you are stuck in a bad relationship and are unable to mend it, break away. Initially, you may feel unbalanced, but with time it will be fine. Even if things do not turn out the way you expected, practice positive thinking and most importantly, have the courage to start all over again. Sometimes, "security" needs to be sacrificed for "satisfaction".
It is very important for you to truly find yourself, before it is too late. If you do not find yourself now, you will spend your life with somebody you do not even know i.e. yourself. Give time to look within and search for answers. Meanwhile, take baby steps towards finding yourself by doing things that please you.